#but it was executed so. Badly sorry

[r1caner]

I luv media about schoolgirls left to fend for themselves in the wilderness that has unnerving and disturbing elements as well as queerness! How I luv media about schoolgirls left to fend for themselves in the wilderness that has unnerving and disturbing elements as well as queerness!

[monstermoviedean]

it doesn't matter how many times i see it i'm still always floored by the me2 thane romance. it's thane talking about how he's spent the past ten years brutally avenging his wife's murder and not having any real social interaction and then shepard being like wow so we need to fuck on this table right now

[pinkfey]

the lack of empathy people have for victims of gun violence is making me rapidly descend into grief and despair and i don’t know what to do about it 👍

[lord-squiggletits]

Ahhhhh I really didn't imagine it, I still dislike Barber's way of writing Orion/Optimus just as much as I did on the first reading and all it took was rereading a few screencaps from one specific scene.

Literally I don't know which part annoys me more: Jetfire existing in the background solely to go "ORION PAX FUCKING SUCKS AND IS A HYPOCRITE", Orion being written like an edgy asshole who hates everyone, or Soundwave talking like an unhinged terrorist and the narrative expecting me to see Orion as the hypocrite for using violence to arrest terrorists.

Soundwave is seriously like "You have no proof we assassinated the Senate, but if we did assassinate the Senate it would've been justified, but also totally trust us bro, just because we could've hypothetically murdered the entire reigning government doesn't mean that we're violent bro come on just bc we assassinated-- I mean could have hypothetically had the means and cause to kill like a hundred people doesn't mean we were gonna kill anyone else, come on bro why are you calling us violent just bc we think some murder is okay" while Jetfire is in the background like "WOW ORION I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE WILLING TO BE VIOLENT IN RESPONSE TO OTHER PEOPLE BEING VIOLENT. YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR OWN SIDE'S FLAWS EVEN THOUGH YOU'RE LITERALLY DOING AN INVESTIGATION TO DECIDE WHETHER ONE OF YOUR COPS COMMITTED AN UNJUSTIFIED KILLING OR NOT. YOU HAVE DONE LITERALLY NOTHING TO TRY AND FIGHT THE CORRUPTION IN SOCIETY." (Jetfire had no way of knowing about OP and crew fighting the Senate's schemes in Shadowplay and Elegant Chaos, but as a reader it's very frustrating seeing Orion getting lambasted as never having done anything to fight society's corruption when he literally did, and by the time he was even working for Zeta Megatron was already evil and had the whole Senate assassinated.)

Like ughhhh oh my god I could have maybe enjoyed this story under a better writer but as it's written it's some "yet you participate in society, curious" levels of political commentary where at least one character seemingly only exists in the scene to shit on OP (something that happens a lot in Barber's works, like with Pyra Magna and Slide) and where OP is framed as a hypocritical asshole for a reaction that's very understandable given the context.

And also it's weird because Barber wants so badly for you to read Orion as some sort of hypocrite for being against terrorist activities but being willing to employ violence himself to arrest terrorists, yet... it turns out the big twist of the story is that the Decepticons WERE smuggling weapons and Soundwave DID lie to Orion (even if it was unintentionally), thus vindicating Orion's entire distrustful attitude? Like, it seems as if it was supposed to be an ACAB story showing how evil the police are for killing people and how Orion (as a cop) is evil for being a cop that uses violence on behalf of the state. Except uh. Then Barber wrote a plot where the Decepticons literally were smuggling weapons all along (and this is alongside lore from Megatron: Origin where we as the readers know for a fact the Decepticons/Starscream killed the Senate) so.... Like, it just seems to me that if Barber wanted to write an ACAB story about how the state monopoly on violence is bad, he probably shouldn't have written the Decepticons as actually being terrorists who literally did lie about smuggling weapons?

I feel like a better way to write an ACAB/anti-state-monopoly-on-violence would've been to like, explore the way that states take advantage of catastrophe/using scapegoat political movements to gather more power to themselves and justify removing citizens' rights with "it's an emergency, we're taking away your freedoms to protect everyone." Like, maybe Zeta passes some law saying that officers can search citizens without a warrant, which he justifies with the fact that Decepticon terrorism is so rampant that officers need immediate permission to conduct raids/searches. Except this is obviously a problem because people have a right to privacy, and probably the cops are super overzealous and end up arresting innocent people without cause (like idk, maybe just being friends with someone who is sympathetic to the Decepticons gets someone landed in jail? Maybe Jetfire gets arrested bc he's critical of the state and has hung out with Decepticon sympathizers before). So then Orion has an actual "are we the baddies?" moment where he wants to stop the bad people, but he realizes that his side are infringing on people's citizens and justifying police brutality for the sake of a nebulous "greater good," and that even though he and his cops were given greater power to supposedly "protect citizens," in practice they're actually doing great harm to citizens by invading their privacy, creating a surveillance state, and imprisoning people without just cause? Basically "we were given this power to stop terrorists from hurting civilians, but now we're hurting civilians too so are we actually doing any good?" Because that way Orion and his cops would ACTUALLY be in the wrong and their state monopoly on violence would be an actually widespread institutional thing where they're clearly being allowed to do bad things just because they're cops. Not just Orion investigating one singular police killing.

But with the story written as "Orion suspected the Decepticons of murdering the Senate (he's correct about this) but still investigated one of his officers to see if he committed a wrongful murder (literally him paying attention to his own side's wrongdoings, Jetfire), and it turns out the Decepticons WERE smuggling weapons and doing terrorism (Orion was correct about this)" it's just.......... like, Orion may not be morally correct, but his hunches/investigations about the suspected criminal activity were literally correct. AND HE WAS WILLING TO DO THIS INVESTIGATION IN THE FIRST PLACE. But for some reason he's still framed as if he's an asshole for this? Even though this is a point in the pre-war lore where Megatron won't back down from violence and has lost his way from his original pure intentions, so it's not like Orion can just go "let's put down our weapons and be friends and mutually trust each other to not stab each other in the back."

It just feels as if Barber's intentions to write an ACAB story where Orion is framed as being too judgmental and quick to be violent don't line up with the actual events of the story. The story is desperately trying to call Orion a hypocrite, but he really just seems as if he's reacting understandably to the events that are happening around him, so there's a real dissonance here where I don't understand why the ACAB story had the cops be right about the Decepticons committing terrorism, and I'm also supposed to see Orion as an asshole for correctly not trusting the Decepticons???

[the-casbah-way]

next chapter of my jedtavius au is here. in which everyone gets stuck in an elevator and octavius is a whore and dexter needs to pee

[bigleoenergy]

Part of me wants to give in and see if Hazbin Hotel got any better since its pilot but Alastors design is to me the visual equivalent of running nails on chalkboard. And when I found out he’s supposed to represent a deer? And he’s from Louisiana in the 1920s??? And he’s CREOLE!??!???

[zahra-hydris]

theodora praising ammabel as being willing to sacrifice underlings' lives in her former life as a commissar

while ammabel is haunted by the thousands who died because of her during her last offensive

[thewickerking]

huh. i have like. No posts abt miraculous ladybug on here. Well. Know that ive been unwell abt this show since. Middle school at least for me so like. 6 years minimum. it sucks so bad but if theres a fact abt me its that I will watch bad tv shows and get emotionally attached to characters the ppl in charge of the show don't like all that much <- chloé enjoyer

[elainemorisi]

old news I know, but Trek writers' ineptitude with romance is just so predictable and yet so extraordinarily varied!

[grimmweepers-archive]

— ★ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: afab!reader. dry humping. premature cumming. ok it’s his first time, he’s trying. reader is a tease. 0.8k words. MDNI. 18+ only.| masterlist

Virgin!Alhaitham who is known for being one of the brightest minds to come out of the Akademiya in years. A genius in his own right who can speak over 20 languages and executes everything he tries to perfection. But still has one thing that’s completely out of his realm: sex. 

He acts like it’s no big deal, shrugging off the idea of casual flings just to get his dick wet. It was beneath him, a pointless distraction from his personal goals. Instead, he turned to erotic literature, dissecting it for information like he would any other subject. It’s still educational, he reasons, a way to learn without getting tangled in something that would just waste his time. 

But then Virgin!Alhaitham starts dating you, and suddenly everything he’s learned doesn’t seem so abstract anymore. He’s thorough, methodical— he thinks he knows enough to ensure his first time with you goes off without a hitch. And yet. 

The first time you grind on his clothed cock, he was unprepared for the intensity, the friction, the heat— before he knew it he was already twitching and soiling his pants, his face flushing with embarrassment as he squeezes his eyes shut, white-knuckling your thighs at the realisation that he just came prematurely. 

“Did you just cum?” You ask with a playful lilt in your voice.

“I didn’t mean to…” he mutters, slightly mortified.

But really, who could blame him? You’re too much for him. Too beautiful. Too sharp. Too incredible with just the right amount of taunting. The way you look at him is overwhelming. Every touch leaves him on edge and every kiss is so sloppy because he wants you so badly, he can barely think straight. 

It happens again and then again after that. No matter how much he tries to keep his cool, to stay calm and focused, he can’t handle it. You make his brain fog up, his thoughts scatter, and he curses himself because all he wants to do is fuck you without cumming at just the sight of your pussy. 

However, you don’t let him off the hook that easily. After he’s ruined his boxers, you love to tug down the waistband and admire the mess he’s made, smearing his seed on your fingers and licking it clean with a grin. Just give it a minute and his cock will be hard as rock all over again. 

When he finally manages to put it in you, it’s with one big, unexpected thrust. He can’t help it— the way your walls gripped the tip sent his hip jerking forward as it moved on instinct. 

“I’m… sorry,” he breathes out, though there was no regret in the way his cock throbbed in you. 

And the worst part? You know exactly what you’re doing to him. You bat those pretty lashes at him, feigning innocence while you’re driving him wild, watching him try not to nut just from groping your tits and hearing you sigh his name with that breathy, sweet voice. 

He’s in over his head and you’ve completely flipped the script. Alhaitham has spent his whole life being the one in charge, always knowing what to do, but with you, he’s just a bundle of raw, needy energy. 

And now— he burns with a desperate need to fuck you harder, faster, to feel every inch of you clenching around him that he’s completely lost in it. You’ve made him realise how much he’s been holding back and now he’s ready to give you everything he’s got. 

So when he starts thrusting, it’s deep and unsteady, driven by hunger he’s never felt before. And poor Alhaitham, so out of his element, feels his usual self-control slipping away with each thrust. He thinks the least he can do is stay quiet, to maintain some semblance of composure. But then you whisper in his ear, telling him he can be as loud as he wants. 

And the moment those words reach him, he breaks, unable to hold back the sounds that had been clawing at his throat. He lets out strings of groans and grunts, each one rougher than the last, filling up the room with his lewd noises. 

He’s determined to keep going, to fuck you senseless but you’re so wet and tight, you’re damn near milking him. Between your occasional praise and begging him for more, he finally snaps with a guttural moan, burying himself inside you. His body trembles as he spills into you but even then, he doesn’t stop. He keeps moving, slower now, to savour every last second, despite the sensitivity.

When it's all over, he collapses on top of you, so utterly spent. All those late nights he allowed himself to indulge by jerking off at the thought of you, feeling a little guilty while trying to imagine what it would be like, was nothing compared to the real thing. 

As he lays there, panting and dazed, he tells himself that this will be a problem.

Because now he can’t do it any other way. If this is what he wanted, he was going to have to get better at it. And being the diligent person that he is, there is only one way to improve: practice. 

And who better to practice on than you?

a/n: the idea of virgin!alhaitham has me breathing into a paper bag

© 2024 grimmweepers — do not repost, copy, translate, modify my work on any platform

reblogs and interactions are always appreciated ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[phagodyke]

why does being at my parents make me feel so physically ill. theyre not even HERE.

[madwomansapologist]

──────〃✰ KINKTOBER DAY 3: 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀

title: sweet dreams synopsis: watching the man you love deny himself of his needs, you take matters into your own hands. or lips, to be more precise. [1.5K] cw: established relationship, service top!reader, somnophilia, body worship, nipple stimulation, masturbation (m!receiving), oral (m!receiving), choking (gn!receiving), hair pulling, overstimulation.

PREV POST ✰ NEXT POST

Some people give, some people take.

The world is a very complicated place, but it’s been a long time since you understood the balance is meant to be broken. Few rejoice youth’s spring, and only because most suffer the harshness of winter’s duties.

Kento knows that too. He saw spring escape from between his fingers as blood warmed his skin and worries filled his mind. A renowned soldier aware of the stupidity of the war he fought.

And he can’t ignore it. He tried, it would be so much easier to go on looking only at the path ahead of him, but Kento can’t. Isn’t that one of the reasons why you fell in love with him? Because he’s good. Because he cares.

Kento became the person that could’ve saved him once his youth rotted. Damn, Kento became the person that would’ve been able to save you when yours faded. He gives, wholeheartedly.

You only wish he would take something for himself too.

How many dreams have he chose to ignore? How many desires have he gave up on? For a man relying on the believe people are fundamentally entitled to have time, Kento doesn’t appear to have noticed how badly he deprives himself of it too.

The creak in the mattress made your eyes flutter open. “Kento?”, you babbled, fighting against your heavy eyelids.

He sighed. “I’m sorry”, Kento whispered. His body involved yours, his cold lips leaving kisses on your bare shoulder. “Go back to sleep, amor.”

You faced him, fingers intertwined with his golden locks. You stroked them, nails scratching lightly his head. Kento’s arms tightened against you. The tension on his body was palpable.

Curtains closed, your phone away so you would need to get up in the morning to turn off the alarm, the lampshade forgotten in the bedside table: you could still see his exhaustion. You felt it in the way Kento couldn’t let you go. You heard it in his deep breath. And smell it in the salty air, a subtle suggestion that blood was washed away.

“Was it bad?”

He hesitated. “Almost”, Kento said.

Your nails moved to his ear. Lightly, you caressed it. Your thumb followed the line of his jaw, the delicate valley of his lips, the veins of his neck. “I can make you forget about it”, you offered. You moved closer, leg sliding between his thighs.

Kento said nothing. Your knee found his crotch, pressing against it. Moving your open palm against his chest, you made a mental note to be good and soft. Your man had enough of rough for the night.

Supported on your elbow, you gave your warmth to his lips. A sweet kiss, innocent as if you couldn’t feel his cock hardening. Kento opened his lips, you almost taste the toothpaste.

And then he turned his face away, depriving himself once more. “I want this. You”, he sounded almost apologetic. As if he did something wrong. “But I’m so tired.”

 You moved your leg away, a deep sigh escaping from Kento’s throat. You took his hand from your hips, massaging his fingers as you led them to your mouth. “Dream with me”, you kissed each of his knuckles.

Kento chuckled. “I always do.”

He went back to hugging you, eyes closing as Kento adjusted his head on the pillow. You scratched his head, and continued even after he told you to rest.

Kento was really tired. He didn’t even call you stubborn.

You admired him. It was so dark, but your eyes still couldn’t look anywhere else. Such a sweet man. Always strong, always ready. The hand that executes is the same that holds you with care. The man that keeps on breathing out of rage wouldn’t dream of showing you anything but his love.

If there has to be a majority suffering, if this needs to be a rule, then you want Kento to be with the few. You wouldn’t mind feeling all the pain alone. As long as it’s his.

And now, already deep asleep, you can still feel him. Half rigid against your tummy. Kento Nanami, a man so used to not have what he wants. Your man, ever the sweetest, never taking what he desires.

So, if Kento won’t take, you’ll give to him. Wholeheartedly.

Your body is his. No complains from Kento will convince you that bleeding in his place isn’t the right thing to do. No pain will stop you from fighting battles alongside him. No tiredness will ever make you think twice before using your domain so he can heal properly.

Your mind is his too. When you look at Kento, all you do is wonder about his needs. Gazing at his eyes, you look for signs of exhaustion. At his thin cheeks, you plan healthy meals. His clothes make you turn on or off the heater. No sickness can get to him before you already know what medicine to buy.

His clock wouldn’t agree, and neither does Kento, but he owns your time too.

Slowly, you moved away from his embrace. The mattress creaked again, and you waited for him to say something. Kento couldn’t have noticed it less.

Your fingers worked on the buttons of his shirt. Putting the soft fabric away, you revealed his torso. Surrounded by darkness, you knew where to kiss every scar. One day you’ll draw stars all around them. Your nails explored the skin of his body, every line and curve remembered carefully by your mind.

Gently, you pressed his nipples between your fingers. You licked them, feeling as they grew rigid, and sucked on them. Leaving a glistening trail of saliva behind, you kissed his whole chest with open mouth.

You kneeled on the mattress, catching your breath. Stretching, you turned the lampshade on. If Kento wakes up, you want him to see how willing you’re to make him feel good. You know he’ll enjoy the sight as much as you love being seen.

Pulling down his boxers, you grabbed his half-hard cock. You pressed your thumb against the rosy head, biting your lips at the feel of him. A baffled grunt made to your ears.

You couldn’t wait any longer.

Placing a kiss over the head, you brushed your nose against his growing erection. Holding Kento, you sucked his heavy balls. The sound of it in the middle of a silent night made you feel like a sinner.

Hell doesn’t seem like that bad of a place now.

You licked his length, losing your mind at the muffled sounds he made. Making out with his head, you drooled over him. What a mess you were making. What a mess your mind was.

Oh, Kento. Such a giver. Always so careful. How you want to break him. Make him fall apart for you. To get Kento crying, begging for all his desires to come true. You would do anything he wanted. If only he would ask you.

Lost on your own fantasies, you chocked on him. So eager. You pumped his cock wet with your drool, so hard between your fingers, and prepared your jaw.

As you took him in, the tender flesh stretched you. Salty against your tongue. You chocked again, but this time you simply continued. With tears forming in your eyes, you devoured him.

You didn’t even notice when Kento’s eyes fluttered open. When the small grunts turned into sensitive moans. When he tried to move, half present and half lost in a sweet dream.

“Wh- “, his fingers grabbed the sheets. Kento moved his neck, the sudden motion burning his wounded back, and looked down. “Oh, fuck.”

Looking at you, eyes closed as you took his entirety into your mouth, Kento shuddered. His body fell on the pillows, hands grabbing your hair without a worry about not being gentle. He couldn’t think. Kento couldn’t do anything but feel.

His hips moved on their own, his mind nowhere to be found. Kento whimpered, eyes closed so hard he could see blurs all around. Was he dreaming still? It feels like one.

Deep into your throat, feeling it gagging around him, Kento cried. Sobbing, tears feel on his ears. It was too good, too sudden. His legs were shaking, his throat burning. Lost in a dream, unaware of how his fingers forced your head down on his length, Kento panted your insides with his thick load.

You didn’t allow one drop to go wasted.

After his high came to an end, Kento noticed he wasn’t breathing. He opened his mouth, trying to get as much air as he could. His throat ached as Kento gasped, surprised by the sweetest kiss he ever received.

“I’m sorry”, you whispered against his lips. Stroking the golden locks, you kissed his chin and cheeks. “Go back to sleep.”

So Kento laughed. Like a maniac. “You are…” Dizzy eyes glared at you, his mouth left hanging open. He smiled. You couldn’t see, but you heard it. He left kisses all over your face. “Dream with me”, he asked.

“I always do”, was your response.

Was the truth.       

taglist: @ffinosie @lovelyy-moonlight @alzaira @s2-angells @eyes-ofhell @inlovewithmariah @chiiyohiimee @shaquilles-0atmeal @bloodyziggy @salemey @kcch-ns @notanalienindisguiseblink @py-schi

© all rights reserved to MADWOMANSAPOLOGIST

[afro-hispwriter]

MILF

Satoru Gojo x reader, Megumi Fushiguro x reader(platonic), 

Summary- “Fushiguro, you didn’t tell me your mom is a total milf.”

Warnings- Yuji being a teenage boy Megumi is a mommas boy

Wc- 900+

-

Ever since Yuji heard the man he would come to know as Satoru Gojo said the words to Fushiguro at the school.

“I got an earful from the higher-ups ‘cause the special grade cursed object’s still missing, then your mother found out and I got an earful from her.” 

Then when he was tied up Gojo kept mentioning his wife and how she helped him suspend his execution for the time being. 

Yuji was even more interested in this woman who was Fushiguros mom and Satoru Gojo’s wife. I mean that would mean Fushiguro is Gojo’s son but he looks nothing like Gojo(besides maybe the hairstyle) and he doesn’t call him Dad. Hmm, maybe he looked more like his mom? 

He walked onto the school grounds with Satoru next to him. Sukuna made an appearance on his cheek then his hand. But as Satoru explained Sukuna, Yuji’s eyes landed on a woman at the top of the stairs. She was talking on the phone and staring at her nails. She wore dark expensive-looking sunglasses, a pair of jeans, sandals, and a tank top. He could also tell she was foreign.

“WIFEY!” Satoru yelled out beside him and ran towards the woman. The woman hung up her phone and opened her arms out for Satoru. He spun her around in the air and then smashed their lips together. He placed her on the ground and she pushed against his chest gently to pull away. “What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t going to be back for another day.” 

She scoffed and crossed her arms and Yuji watched the sorcerer in front of her pout.

“My son got sent on a mission to retrieve the finger of Ryomen Sukuna and got badly hurt in the process. Of course, I had to come.”

So this is his mom. She looks nothing like him either but I gotta say, she is one hot piece-

“So this is Sukunas vessel?” They had turned their attention to him and Yuji was staring directly at Gojo’s wife.

“Before we start talking, Yuji, this is my wife Y/n L/n. She's a special-grade sorcerer just like me!”

Whatever that means, nobody’s explained this grading stuff to me yet

“Yuji Itadori. A pleasure to meet you.” She gave him a bow and he did the same back. “How do you feel?” Her face softened and she took two steps down to inspect him. 

“Um fine, I guess, considering everything.” 

“Good, good. And you can control Sukuna at will?” 

“Mhmm.” 

She’s so hot

“I'm flattered Itadori.” She says with amusement and the boy looks at her horrified.

“Huh!?” He blushed heavily and shook his head. “I'm so sorry! Wait, how did you know that!?” 

“Oh yeah, Y/n’s technique is telepathy. So my girl can read your mind, control your mind, mess with your mind, and destroy it.” He said and kissed her cheek. 

“Cool! Sorry about that though.” He scratched the back of his head and laughed awkwardly. 

“It's okay, Itadori.” Yuji’s blush hadn’t gone away and just burnt harder. “Well I'm going to go check on Megumi, I’ll see you two later.” Both guys watched her go. 

“Whoah,” Yuji says and Satoru nods.

“I know right.”

-

“Megumi?” You knocked on his door and received no answer. You opened the door and saw him curled up in deep sleep. You smiled softly and approached his bed. You leaned over him and kissed his cheek, making him twitch but he relaxed. You sat in the chair in the corner and brought your feet up. 

Megumi slept for another solid 10 minutes before waking up. You set your phone down and smiled.

“Hey Gumi, how are you feeling?” You sat on the edge of his bed and rubbed his shoulder.

“Mom, what are you doing here?” He asks, sounding extremely tired. 

“I had to come check on you.” 

“Mmph.” He sat up and groaned. 

“You should keep resting.”

“My head hurts.” 

“All the more reason to.”

The loud voices of Yuji and Satoru cut you off. Megumi's face hardened and he threw the sheets off his body. He opened the door and at the same time, Yuji and Satoru walked out of Yuji's new room. 

“You’re next door?” 

“Hey, Fushiguro!” You slipped past Megumi and walked to stand by Satoru. “Wow. You look all better now!”

“There are lots of other rooms, you know?” Megumi says with a scowl.

“Don’t be like that Gumi’, this can be good for you.” You say trying to convince him but he crosses his arms. Yuji walked up to Megumi and leaned towards him.

“Fushiguro, you didn’t tell me your mom is a total milf.” Yuji whispers to him. Megumi's eyes widened and left eye twitched.

“Huh!? Wh-Why would you say something like that!” Megumi whacked Yuji on the back. 

“Ow! I mean it's true, and that ass though. She could put Jennifer Lawernce to shame.” 

“STOP IT!” 

“Boys, everything okay?” 

“Yes, Mrs. Gojo!” Itadori says with a bright smile. While Megumi looked like he was going to blow a fuse. You look at them in confusion but turn back to Satoru. 

“That's my mom Itadori.”

“Hey, Mrs. Gojo. Are you a teacher here?” Yuji asks you and you shake your head. 

“No, but I'll be sticking around.” 

“Great!” Yuji thumbs up’s you. 

“Hmph.” Megumi grunts and glares. 

Sorry J Law but my type is Fushiguros mom now

-

More on the reader technique by risingblackstar 

[obey-me-but-bad]

welcome to: OBEY ME AS RETOLD BY BADLY DRAWN COMICS

or, more simply: OBEY ME, BUT BAD

schedule: whenever! i have many other things to do and very bad executive function so sorry about the inconsistent posting and the inconsistent art

askbox is open! i prob won't respond to much just to keep the blog neat (except for special occasions) but i will be delighted by anything anyone wants to say to me

navigation below ⬇️

Season One

Lesson One: 1 -> 2 -> 3

Lesson Two: 4 -> 5 -> 6

[floydira]

₊˚﹒✶﹒trolls headcanons .ᐟ

brozone, creek & king trollex with a reader going through a breakdown, overthinking and panicking and how they deal with them.

note ; I somehow(?) accidentally deleted the person's ask for this. I don't remember exactly what they asked word for word. (I'm down on my knees apologizing to you rn, I'm so sorry anon 🙏) so hopefully based on my memory this is at least close to what you asked for. I also hope this headcanon is to your liking.

☆★﹒🎧 ﹐BROZONE

John Dory

erm. well. let's just say when it comes to dealing with other people's emotions, he's not really the best guy to depend on...

BUT considering he spent years by himself (and rhonda) with no other socialization, plus leaving his brothers behind and coming back to them after awhile out of conscious but seeing them nowhere to be found, he definitely felt lonely and HAD his own breakdowns before.

so he'd understand how you're feeling, or at least try to understand.

when he first saw you breaking down, his first instinct was to ask you questions "why are you breaking down?" "did something happen?"

if he doesn't get a reply from you, he'll respect your boundaries and not ask any further questions. he'll just focus on comforting you in the present, awkwardly patting your back and giving you words of affirmation that he thinks would work. like those motivational phrases or quotes online, maybe even those ones that facebook moms use.

if you do give a reply, he'll sit down next to you and hear you out. sipping a drink and lending his ears for you to vent. he'll keep quiet (internally, he's restraining himself from outing his own opinions on whatever you vented to him about).

In summary, he's a listener. If you let him voice his own opinions, he'll tell you his thoughts and views. more often than not, if he does give advice, it's probably best you don't actually follow them. I feel like he's bad at giving advice...

at least, he's got the spirit!

Spruce/Bruce

this troll has a wife and kids. I'm sure he's knowledgeable in comforting someone when they are breaking down or overthinks a lot.

if you're overthinking, he'll support you and keep you company but he's also honest that helps you actually evaluate your overthinking thoughts and not stress too much about them.

once you come to him looking vulnerable, he'll immediately try to soothe you by rubbing your back gently. yk like those back rubs that puts babies to sleep? yeah, he'll do that.

while he rubs your back, he urges you to take a deep breath and let it all out. so you do. unknowingly you ranted and ranted, every little detail spoken word to word. he just has that affect on people.

lets you know that what you're going through is valid.

once you're all done, he'll give you advice to ease you or if you're not looking for advice, he'll just comfort you until you feel better.

Clay

he literally is in a sad book club, he'll have the knowledge about it and how to deal with it. except...he's slightly bad at executing it.

he'll snap you out of overthinking by yelling positive stuff to you, that are actually...effective???

if you rant to him, he'll listen to you attentively and pat your head afterwards. it's just something natural that he does, honestly head pats are soothing ok.

if you're okay with physical touch, he'll caress your face while giving you actually reassuring words. (LIKE. have you SEEN him literally pinching and squishing branch's face when he first met him after 20 years?!) of course, it's effective, combined with his already nice vibe (I feel like he naturally has a healing presence, he's just a sweet little boring cutie)

his method of comforting you naturally makes you feel better. he doesn't have to try hard because just watching his body language and mannerisms are dorky enough that it'll make you smile. he's unknowingly comforting in a silly dorky way. even with how badly he persists to be a very "serious" guy.

he'll definitely give you a big warm hug after everything.

Floyd

he's literally called the sensitive one. out of the brothers, he's definitely the one who understands you the most.

I don't think I even need to explain, you already know how perfect he is with dealing with stuff like that. like the time he talked to veneer about how his sister treats him and how he shouldn't let her be like that to him.

his face is full of worry if he sees you in a vulnerable state.

he literally gives the best hugs, it's canon, I know it's canon.

this emo mf knows exactly the right words to get you out of your vulnerable state for a while (bc the phrases he gives to others are probably what he wants to hear given to him).

he'll be really patient with you and help you with every step along the way even if you're having a hard time changing your bad traits.

he's also attentive at listening, he'll caress your hands with his thumb with a reassuring smile.

he'll be really sweet at tackling your situation and never makes you feel overwhelmed.

will cry with you tbh.

he's kind of helping himself when he helps you, because he's similar in a way.

Branch

branch was quite the panicker himself during the times when bergens ate trolls.

so he'd also know how to help you deal with it because he understands you.

he had to figure it out himself and was mostly alone to deal with his own vulnerability so he's happy to help you.

he'll look calm, composed and collected externally but even he, himself is slightly panicking on the inside. afraid that he'll let you down or he won't be of much help. don't worry though, he has it all put together after a bit.

If you're panicking, he'll help you focus, calm down and ease your hyperventilation.

"concentrate on your breathing, okay?"

once you've calmed down, he'll provide you with reassuring words.

he'll keep you company and stay with you until you feel composed enough to talk about it with him. he'll lend you an ear.

afterwards, he pats you on the shoulder and gives you advice that worked on him before.

━━━━━━━━━━

Creek

as bad as he is, he's literally the best when it comes to relaxation. he has that zen-like wisdom, so he'll calm you down and help you relax if you're panicking or overthinking too much.

just like floyd, he also knows exactly what to say to reassure or cheer someone up.

he'll give you a more positive outlook on whatever happened to you so that you don't overthink it.

tbh his voice itself is enough to calm you down.

he encourages different methods and ways(that he knows of) to you that could help.

King Trollex

this sweet goober offers you all his emotional support.

he feels upset, if you're upset. he's all frowny when he sees you vulnerable.

"can I give you a hug?" ofc he asks for consent.

will hug you tightly (he thinks hugs are a remedy for everything, besides music), quiet sobs are heard as his face is smooshed against your chest. just like bruce, he'll also rub your back soothingly while hugging you.

Intertwines both of your hands and encourages you to put your thoughts into words so that he knows what's going on that head of yours that's overthinking a lot of stuff.

keeps eye contact with you as you rant to him.

"you can get through this." he'll say with his cute smile.

the most he can provide is listening and comfort. he wishes he could help you more.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Pressure reader finding a gun and now can and will defend themself from monster or execute other people for doing something dumb

I'm sorry but I saw this and decided to run with how finding a gun might actually go for a Prisoner!Reader /lh

..................

"Wow...guess somebody forgot to pick this up. Or maybe Sebastian got tired of me dying to those monsters all the time.."

Staring down at the weapon that was just laying on the floor, you looked around to see if any cameras were currently watching you. Of course, there was a singular one with a red light in the corner above the next door, aimed directly at your position.

They were always watching.

From the comfort and safety of their headquarters, they watched you get maimed by the creatures here over and over again. Whether it's a Wall Dweller sneaking up on you or Pandemonium ramming into the locker you're hiding in nonstop....they've seen it all.

So at this point, you didn't care that they could see your clear interest in the object on the ground.

One you were forbidden to take.

But to hell with them and their rules.

After all you've suffered through down here, you deserved to have some kind of self-defense tool that wasn't just a light source you had to conserve.

Why shouldn't you be allowed to protect yourself? They were going to kill all the creatures who escaped containment, anyways, so if you could kill them now, why not?

Unfortunately, HQ begged to differ, as the moment you crouched down to pick up the pistol, a familiar voice came onto the intercom:

"Do not touch the weapon. Leave it alone and it will be collected by authorized personnel later."

"...figures." You glared at the camera, standing up. "Why don't you tell your "authorized personnel" to put down those sea monsters instead?! I think I'm allowed to defend myself if-"

*pop*

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"Back here again, are we?"

"Yeah..I guess.." Grumbling, you rubbed your neck as you looked up at the familiar trio of glowing blue eyes and angler lure. Even now, you still had a killer headache from the PDG detonation.

Then again, that was your own fault.

You didn't need to read the same document twice.

"I don't recommend defying them again. At least..not until you find a way to scramble their connection." Sebastian advised, sighing as he shook his head. "You gotta remember you have no rights down here. Neither of us do. It sucks but, we gotta deal with it."

"The IDS has gone haywire..but they're worried about me shooting through a glass window.." You huffed. "What if it wasn't even loaded?"

"Well I'm not sure if you know this, but prisoners and guns don't exactly go together. Just use what you've learned in the past to avoid the threats. It doesn't matter to them how "badly" you think you needed a firearm. You'll never get your hands on one, and I'm certainly not gonna sell any to you. Period."

"....I guess that pistol would've been useless if it didn't any rounds..."

"Anyway, here's what your overseer had to say on the matter. It's..kinda funny." Sebastian showed you another file, documenting your time and cause of death, along with a comment.

"The EXR-P stumbled across a small firearm that was left behind during the lockdown and defied direct orders to drop it, thinking they were an exception to the rule. This cannot happen again."

"Okay, that's bullshit. They're making it sound like I was an entitled asshole." You pointed out.

"Yeah, well, I can see why. Backtalking them is funny and all until your head pops. If you want them to take you seriously, you'll have to reach that crystal."

"Fine. I'll be a good little expendable and just focus on that." Putting a ferryman token on the table, you looked up at Sebastian. "Tell the guy downstairs I wanna continue where I was."

"Alright. Better not waste it." He swiped the coin, fading back into the darkness.

In the blink of an eye, you returned to the Blacksite, in the same room that you died in. It was clear of any blood that was left behind after your PDG went off, and of course..the pistol wasn't anywhere to be found.

It would have been useless anyways.

On the bright side, you did find a blacklight and some batteries in the drawers that you didn't check before, and you realized it's wiser to just use them to protect yourself.

'Okay. Let's just play it safe and keep going.'